Welcome to Our Home Page !

Are you over 40 and gay? Be honest now! Are you looking for people who share your interests?

If so, Mature Friends is for you! Our active, fun-loving group of over 200 members meets regularly to share common interests such as hiking, cooking, playing bridge or pinochle, dining out, going to theater, and traveling (both locally and internationally).

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Who Are We?

We are you . . . or who you will eventually be — gay and lesbian individuals and couples over 40. To join up, all you have to do is pay nominal yearly dues and show up at any of our events. Membership is confidential! We do not share our membership list with any other organizations or individuals, period.

Formed in 1989, Mature Friends has grown into a large nonprofit, nonpartisan, nonsectarian organization with influence throughout the local gay community and even beyond. Leveraging the group’s vitality and size, members can participate in a variety of activities and find a network already in place for supporting the community at large.

Paying Our Dues

Groups our size naturally incur operating expenses, and Mature Friends is no exception. To rent the Ballard Odd Fellows Hall and to cover other expenses, members pay annual dues, which cover the period of July 1 through June 30 of the following year.

Members pay their dues on July 1 every year. Of course, the dues are prorated for those who join in mid-year.

 

How to Join

Why not join us today and get in on the fun? Call or write to ask any questions or to request a membership form or print the form from this site.

Come on, meet some new friends and join in on the fun! A good place to start is with our next potluck, at the Ballard Odd Fellows Hall.

To find out the date of our next potluck or any other activity, check out the date in the current newsletter.

Hey, by the way, first-time guests at the potluck don’t need to bring anything!

Disclaimer

Mature Friends, its officers, directors, and members, hereinafter known as The Club, may assist members to arrange travel, outings, meals, and other activities. The Club assumes no responsibility for any loss, injury or expense incurred by members’ participation in these activities, and cannot be held liable for any acts of commission, or omission, on behalf of any vendors that may be involved. Participants should take measures to protect their investments and participation in group activities.

 

Where We Meet

Our main meeting place is centrally located in downtown Ballard at the Odd Fellows Hall. All of our potlucks take place here, as well as the bridge club, the pinochle club, and the weekly exercise group. When you arrive, go upstairs. If there are no stairs, then you’re at the wrong place! Check out the address below, and click the link for a map.

Odd Fellows Hall (Homebase)

Ballard Odd Fellows Hall
1706 N.W. Market Street
Seattle, Washington 98107

  

Other activities meet elsewhere, and sometimes their meeting place changes from month to month. To find up-to-date locations for each activity, see the Upcoming Events section of the current newsletter. Click this button:

 

When We Eat

Like any army of people, we at Mature Friends travel on our stomach. Practically every time we get together, we eat. To accomplish this feat, we offer four regular activities centered around food. Each activity consists of either dining in or dining out. Actually, there are more than four, but the others are informal, such as the lunch out after exercise class on Wednesdays.

Dining In

Dining Out
Monthly Potluck Bimonthly Lunches
Dinner for Six Monthly Dinner

Dining In

Although there are only two dining in activities per month, they are major lynch pins that hold us together and allow us to share our culinary arts with other members of the group.

Monthly Potluck

On the last Friday of each month, members at large get together for a potluck dinner in Ballard. This event is the brick and mortar of Mature Friends, allowing members to keep in touch regularly and to welcome prospective members.

For information about the potluck for this month, click the following button:

But the potluck is more than just dinner — it’s a social and educational event. Beginning at 6:30 with appetizers, we socialize while sampling each other’s culinary creations. At around 7:30, the main course is served, with several dishes for each course — salad, main, and vegetable. Then sometimes a guest speaker gives a short program, which can vary from art displays to presentations from other gay groups to tales of adventure abroad. After the program, it’s time for dessert, coffee, and more socializing.

Normally, the potluck is held at our homebase in Ballard.

But two months out of the year we do something different:

Dinner for Six

For those who want to open their homes to a small group of Mature Friends who love to cook and entertain, you can join the Dinner for Six. This activity consists of a pool of gourmets and novices who share a love of cooking and entertaining. The pool is divided into couples (either real partners or just friends who double-up). Each couple takes an evening during a month to cook a dinner for the other two couples. When the group has rotated three times, the pool of members is shuffled into different groups of six people.

But you do not have to be a four-star chef to join the Dinner for Six. All you need is a desire to share your favorite foods with a fun-loving group who appreciates all kinds of meals.

Dining Out

If you enjoy eating out with a lively group of restaurant afficiandos, then by all means join our Knife and Fork Club for our lunches and dinners out.

Click the button for this month’s schedule:

Lunches Out

Twice a month, as many of us as possible get together for lunch at a local restaurant. Lately, the location has been alternating between Charlie's for the first lunch and the Rosebud Restaurant for the second lunch. Both restaurants are conveniently located on Capitol Hill. These lunches are purely social and allow members to touch base with each other in a gay-friendly atmosphere.

Dinner Out

In addition to the lunches, once a month the group meets for dinner out. For variety, the specific restaurant will change from time to time. Lately, we’ve been meeting at the 125th Street Grill, which offers a varied menu, high in quality. The 125th Street Grill, like any other restaurant we choose, offers a full bar, separate checks, and easy access.

 

What We Do

Never letting moss grow underfoot, Mature Friends is an active group. From simply playing bridge or pinochle to travel abroad to competing and winning medals in the Gay Games every four years, you’ll surely find an activity to entice you. Remember that large groups have the clout to negotiate lower rates on any kind of activity, from theater tickets to trips overseas. This clout leaves you with more money for shopping, dining in fancy restaurants, or splurging on anything else that appeals to you. And you get the added advantage of enjoying these activities with a ready-made group of people who share your interests.

The following list describes the activities we currently engage in. If you don’t see anything that appeals to you, don’t get discouraged. You can always start a new activity. The list just keeps growing. So, come on, check us out!

Activities

  
Discussing Books Seeing Shows
Investing Funds Walking and Hiking
Getting Healthy Taking Trips
Playing Bridge Playing Pinochle
Visiting Gardens Tasting Wines

 

Discussing Books

What have you been reading lately?

If you like to read contemporary fiction and non-fiction, we have just the club for you! One of the newest in Mature Friends’ pantheon of activities, the book club gives members an opportunity to read and discuss a book every month. We aim to choose books that receive critical acclaim, often because they have won a literary or journalistic prize or simply because they are “best sellers” and people are talking about them. Since quite a few of these noteworthy books now include gay and lesbian themes, we often read such books. Although we don’t promise that every book will be a gem, we take the attitude that we can learn something from any book.

We meet monthly in the early evening and in a member’s home where we share some cookies and coffee, spend a little time getting to know each other, and settle down to discuss the book. There is a lot of thoughtful discussion, and you will have a good time joining in. This isn’t the graduate level seminar you would find at a University, but if you like reading and want to share ideas with others in a spirit of conviviality, this is for you.

Look for the announcement in the newsletter identifying the book and the meeting place. All the books we read are in paperback and most of the books come from the Seattle Public Library’s special collection for book clubs.

Some of the books we have read are:

So, what are you waiting for? Sign up for this month’s book today! Be sure to check the newsletter for current information.

Investing Funds

So, you don’t know a small cap from a large cap - or even a baseball cap? Come join one of our investment clubs and learn while you earn. Mature Friends Investment Club meets on the first Monday of each month, and A Better Club for Investing meets on the third Monday. Any member of Mature Friends who wants to add to their savings by investing with a group can get ahead through consensus and judicious investments by joining one of these clubs. Not only do you add to your portfolio, but you learn more about wise financial planning and how the markets work. Meetings are conducted over dinner at a variety of cafes in the Seattle area, giving you the chance to hone your fiduciary skills while expanding your repertoire of local eateries.

 

Getting Healthy

Forget Jenny Craig! Join Mature Friends, exercise free of charge, and meet others who like to keep active. Every Wednesday morning a group of varying abilities meets at the Ballard Odd Fellows Hall for an hour of stretching, bending, and moving. Total cost is only $5.00 per person per month, to help pay for supplies and rent for the hall.

After the class, those who didn’t get enough movement head off for a brisk walk around Green Lake to help work up a hearty appetite for . . . what else? — lunch! at a nearby restaurant.

The exercise group is coordinated by Len Tritsch, a retired teacher and coach of track and field. He has taught courses on fitness at seminars on aging, he competes regularly in masters’ track events, both local and international including the Gay Games and the Out Games, and he also coaches Team Seattle’s track and field group.

 

Playing Bridge

Not for card sharks only, members who are interested in testing their skills meet every Wednesday at the Odd Fellows Hall in Ballard. Not exactly tournament bridge or cutthroat, this activity is for anyone no matter the level of skill, from beginner to pro. The purpose is to relax and have some fun at the card table. Like the pinochle group, there is a slight fee collected to off-set the rental of the hall.

 

Playing Pinochle

Join other members for some pinochle fun. The group meets on the first and third Wednesdays at the Odd Fellows Hall in Ballard. Depending upon the number of participants, you can play from three handed to five handed games. You don't have to be an expert, we'll teach you how to play. Like the bridge group, there is a slight fee collected to off-set the rental of the hall.

 

Seeing Shows

It’s show time, folks! With lower group rates, it’s easy and cheaper to see local professional and college productions around the town. So . . . Lights! Camera! Action! — Whoa! CUT! CUT! CUT!!! Not that kind of show (although it’s been done!). What we’re really talking about here is something with a higher brow — live theater, opera, concerts, and of course, performances of the various gay and Lesbian choruses.

But in addition to our formal outings as a group, many members get together informally on short notice for impromptu outings of two to six persons. Something similar took place while we were touring Europe a couple years ago with a beautiful concert in Vienna. Can you imagine? Enticing, eh?

For our upcoming plans, see the blurb in the latest newsletter.

 

Walking and Hiking

If structured exercise isn’t for you, or if you’d just like to explore the local area on foot, you can always join us for our monthly hike. Hiking in natural areas outdoors, whether mountains, seashore, or desert, refreshes the spirit and the body. In our walking and hiking activities, we focus on places with moderate length and elevation. In summer and fall, we sometimes take longer hikes out of town, while in the rainy season, we lean toward local hikes and walks.

All hikes are day hikes. If we go out of town and you share a ride, expect to chip in a few dollars to the driver for gas.

So, keep an eye on the newsletter to see announcements of this healthy, invigorating activity. And then come and join us! Take in some fresh air while sharing the pleasure of seeing nature with friends. Warning! The enjoyment may become addictive.

 

Taking Trips

Mature Friends love to travel. From near to far, we’re on the go every year.

From day trips to long weekends to short hops to Nevada, we take reasonably priced escapes to visit wineries, to see the fall leaves, to spend long weekends in Vancouver and in Portland, and to visit favorite, inexpensive gambling sites and see shows. Our experienced travel committee is always coming up with exciting, affordable get-aways.

For those who like to venture a bit farther, we’ve taken tours of Eastern Europe, cruises to the Mediterranean and countries around it, sailed to South America and around the Horn, and recently cruised to Australia and New Zealand.

Each year offers new and exciting destinations. So be sure to check out the latest newsletter online for details of upcoming adventures.

 

Visiting Gardens

From spring to fall, when the weather is still good, our resident bontanist leads a group of Mature Friends on tours of local gardens. These tours never fail to delight the eyes and please the noses of our members from home gardeners to experienced horticulturalists. Each month takes us to some place new around the Sound as we see various innovative arrangements by professional as well as skilfull amateur gardeners.

So, be sure to join us on these tours to learn new tips and tricks to make your garden bloom to its full potential, or just come along and smell the roses and enjoy the good company.

Be sure to check out the newsletter and see what new and exotic destinations await you!

 

Tasting Wines

Every other month, the oenophiles of Mature Friends meet at a member’s house to sample specific types and vintages of wines. From Chardonnays of Oregon to the Malbecs of Argentina, our wine group sits squarely on the cutting edge of highest quality wines at affordable prices.

A wine is assigned in advance and everybody brings a bottle to pass. Then we all sample what each other has brought and share what we know about that vintage. But don’t be intimidated. The group’s experience ranges from novice to well-informed connoisseur.

So come and sample the grape in a relaxed, convivial atmosphere of like-minded gourmets. Give it a try. Check out what we’re tasting next.

 

Who Runs Us

To coordinate a big group with a number of activities, you need careful organization and leadership. Mature Friends has both. During the June potluck each year, we elect a 8-person board of directors from the membership at large, and this board elects officers from its membership. Meeting monthly, the board and officers manage the affairs of the organization. Board members and officers can serve up to two years consecutively.

How the Board Is Organized

The board, in turn, is split into committees, headed by board members. Each committee is responsible for a specific group activity or event. All members are encouraged to serve on the board or on a committee, in line with their interests.

As mentioned earlier, Mature Friends publishes a monthly newsletter to inform the membership of upcoming events and to convey additional information of general interest. In the newsletter, you’ll find a calendar of the current month’s events so that you can see at a glance what’s going on when. Although board members write the main content of the newsletter, Mature Friends encourages everyone to submit an article now and then.

 

How to Contact Us

If you have any questions or would like further details about any specific events or about Mature Friends in general, please contact us either by regular mail or e-mail:

 

What’s Related

On this page, you’ll find links to other gay and Lesbian web sites.

 

What’s Past?

Everybody has a past. Some are quite — What’s the polite word? Oh, yes . . . colorful. And some are quite sordid. Then there are those . . . well, you don’t really want to know. But many are open books. Luckily, Mature Friends’ history is the latter.

Why Do We Need a History?

The history of any organization resides in its members. This is all the more so with voluntary organizations. However, with the passage of time, individuals with knowledge of the organization may leave the group through attrition, relocation and death, leading to a loss of its history.

There is a need to preserve an organization’s history, not only for the continuity of the organization, but as a legacy for the future of the community it serves. Mature Friends has been an organization for older gay men and women for many years, but has not made any concerted effort to record its history.

Gay studies is increasingly becoming a legitimate academic pursuit, so for an organization to be included in the development of gay culture, it is incumbent to leave behind documentation of its activities in a form and place that will be accessible to future historians. It is with this recognition that the Board of Mature Friends established a History Committee in June 2005 and allocated funding to gather and document the early history of Mature Friends.

How Did We Obtain the History?

One of our long-time members, Wes N., was appointed Chairman of the History Committee. A volunteer committee was gathered, which decided upon the operation of the committee, how it will gather its information, and ultimately, the disposition of its findings in a form and place accessible to future scholars and laymen.

The committee decided to obtain oral histories from as many of the founding and early members as could be identified and assembled. A set of questions covering important topics that each of the interviewees should address was compiled. Each interview session was recorded on tape and later transcribed. For this, the committee was fortunate in having the services and cooperation of Ruth Pettis of the Seattle Gay History Project. Alvin Fritz of the Gay Library of the University of Washington was also contacted. The U.W. Library will be the final repository of the information collected and the final report, as well as ancillary documents.

The committee interviewed ten persons who were founding members or were members at an early stage of the club. The interviews were conducted in an informal setting, with the interviewee free to recall his or her early experiences with the club. Committee members in attendance were free to interject, to comment on, amplify and in some instances correct statements that were made. It was apparent at this stage, some 16 to 18 years after the founding of the club, that memories were a little hazy. Fortunately, the club has a extensive archive of materials which was an invaluable resource in the preparation of this report.

The list committee members, questions asked of the interviewees, and individuals interviewed are listed in the appendices, which are not published here.

So, grab your favorite snack and pull your chair closer to the computer. Relax and enjoy an overview of how this unique group formed and how it became the large, multifaceted social group we have today, with over 200 members strong.

How Did We Form?

All the persons interviewed generally agreed that John Reeder was the catalyst behind the formation of Mature Friends. John had not intended to found a new organization, but had preferred to work with existing organizations. One such organization was the Lavender Panthers, an off shoot of the Gay and Lesbian Task Force, a group created by the then Mayor of Seattle, Wes Uhlman. John was interested in having an organization as a safe place where men and women of the community can come together. John’s first association with the Lavender Panthers was to help them organize a Christmas party in 1988. John enthusiastically helped plan the party, and in the end, did the decorations with fresh greens, provided red table cloths and a program. John’s energetic efforts were not viewed favorably by the women who comprised most of the original members of the Lavender Panthers. His efforts were regarded as a “taking over” of the club.

John still felt a need for an organization where older gays and lesbians, those over 50 years of age, could meet socially in a safe environment. A safe environment meant a non-bar environment, in as much as these were older people for whom the bar scene was not a good place to meet others in a similar age range. In addition, John himself had recovered from alcoholism, so bars were not a good environment for him. John put together some ideas and called upon Don Moreland and Harold Mick, who were both at that fateful Christmas party. As early as January 4, 1989, letters of invitation were sent to friends to attend an organizational meeting on January 13, 1989. A second meeting on January 27, 1989, was held to elect temporary officers and to consider a name for the organization. The first or acting officers were: Don Moreland, president; Shirley Maser, vice-president; Eugene Van Voorhees, treasurer, and John Reeder, secretary. A specifically gay name was to be avoided since many of the target population (that is, prospective members) were wary about being in an outwardly gay organization. A dichotomy should be noted, as pointed out by several of the interviewees, that some of the same people had no qualms about frequenting the gay bars. A name was expeditiously chosen, as correspondence soon after the January 27 meeting contained the name “Mature Friends.” Legend has it that either John Reeder or Glen Hunt sat down with a dictionary and came up with the right combination of words. The name was also attributed to one of the early members, Dorothy Farley. The group was known thereafter as “Mature Friends”. The statement of purpose was “Mature Friends is a resource organization of individuals 50 years and older promoting human services, social interaction, education, and comradrie (sic) in and for the Lesbian and Gay community.”

With February 1989 coming up, a Valentine party for gay and lesbian seniors was planned. The social room at Grace Gospel Church in Ballard was obtained free of charge. Invitations were sent out and others were contacted by word of mouth. Around 25 people attended. It might be said that Mature Friends had its beginning at that Valentine party. [I recall attending a February potluck a year or two later at Greenwood Hall, which John Reeder had decorated in a Valentine theme. John proclaimed it an anniversary potluck. — ]. While the Valentine party was a success, it should be noted that it was a new experience for many of the people who attended. Many had lived their lives with their gay persona hidden from all but their closest friends, and here they were, at a party with people whom they barely knew or had not known at all. As John recalled, people barely uttered their first names.

The success of the Valentine party prompted the fledging organization to look for a larger space. Again, it was John Reeder who came to the fore. John had access to Greenwood Hall in Phinney Ridge. He lived next door and managed the hall. Club members helped to clean up and paint the hall, and helped John install a small kitchen. The monthly potlucks and activities such as the Bridge group met at Greenwood Hall until 1995. By then the membership had grown and a larger space was needed. Thanks to a lead from member Bob Johnson, the club moved to the Odd Fellows Hall in Ballard, where the group continues to meet at the present time.

In the months following that first Valentine party, John, Don, Harold (nicknamed “Mick”) Eugene Van Voorhees, Shirley Maser, Glen Hunt and many others continued to meet. They still had in mind Mature Friends as a social service organization. To be a credible organization when it came to tax exempt (501(c)3) status consideration, they felt it necessary to be on a sound financial footing. Fund raising activities were planned. One such fundraising activity was a garage sale, which was tremendously successful. Other fundraisers were progressive dinners, at which attendees contributed money. These activities put the club on a firm financial basis. The progressive dinners eventually evolved into the “Table for Eight,” social gatherings wherein members gathered in groups of eight for dinner at a member’s home. They would then rotate among the group of eight. Eight people for dinner proved to be unwieldy and the concept changed to “Dinner for Six,” which has been quite successful and continues to the present time.

Social activities were always part of Mature Friends. Some of the early activities were Saturday Socials, Lunch/Tea Dance, and outings such as one to the Tulip Festival. Travel was spearheaded by Eugene Van Voorhees and is still one of the major activities today. The Saturday Social and the Lunch/Tea Dance did not last for long, but very soon dining out, both lunch and dinner, became a regular activity. Garden tours was also a popular activity. Both the dining out and garden tours were ideas promoted by Glen Hunt [it should be noted that Glen Hunt was a Landscape Architect]. A most enduring activity has been the potluck dinner. This began in mid-1989 and continues as the most prominent monthly event. Later activities included monthly walk/hike, both locally and farther afield, a weekly exercise group led by Len Tritsch, and more recently a pinochle group which meets twice a month.

While the club avoided an outwardly gay name, early on, the active members promoted the club within the gay community. At the Pride Festival of 1989, the club staffed a booth to inform the community of the new organization and to recruit members. In 1996 and 1997, the club had a contingent in the Pride parades. Although Mature Friends has reached out to the gay community, club membership was and is still confidential. Only board members and activity heads have access to the membership list to conduct their affairs.

In the beginning, there was a strong involvement of women in the organization. They served on committees and were board members. However, as the club grew, the number of women members has decreased as well as their participation in the club organization and activities. The bridge group still attracts a fair number of women players. The decline in women members and their participation was regularly broached during the interviews for this history, but no definitive answer or answers were forthcoming. [At present, women comprise seven percent of the membership.]

The club has been a success as a social organization. As a group, it remains non-political and non-sectarian. The original idea as a social-service organization has largely been abandoned, mainly because the membership preferred it as a social organization. A Sunshine Committee functions currently to recognize members’ birthdays, send get well wishes on illnesses and condolences upon the death of members.

This report is not an exhaustive history of Mature Friends. It covers the founding of the club and the events leading to its founding. It addresses the questions raised by the History Committee, and tries to find a common answer from among the people interviewed. In some cases, the answers were supplemented by information from the archive for clarity. A ten-year retrospective was written by Jerry Olson, which appeared in the February 1999 newsletter. It is included in the appendix of this report. When a president's term is completed, such president will write a summary report. These will be kept as part of the history of the club. A summary of the second decade will soon be in preparation.

— Dan L.

 

— Curt Johnson, Webmaster
— Gordon Lovell, Assistant Webmaster